Tuesday, January 28, 2020

What am I Supposed to Say

What am I supposed to say?
What am I supposed to do?
With the way the world looks at me,
With the way I’m left behind by the world,
Even by the people who surround me.
I know things change,
I see them change.
As I watched a sprout grow into a tree,
I watched as everyone around me grew.
Is there something wrong with me?
Am I broken?
But that’s what I am, I’m broken.
Is that why I feel so alone?
Don’t tell me that’s it my fault,
Even if it is, I’m trying alright
Because I want to breath,
I want to be whole.
You can’t see it but I’m drowning,
I’m gasping for breath in the sea of my emotions.
The emotions that fill and flood my broken form,
This glass star heart,
Its light is fading,
It still burns,
But it hurts, the tears hurt.
Even the silence.
What am I supposed to say?
What am I supposed to do?
With the way the world looks at me,
With the way I’m left behind by the world,
Even by the people who surround me.
I know everything changes,
I know the seed will grow into a flower.
I know even dust can become a star.
Why am I this way?
Am I mistake, an error,
Am I broken?
I’m broken, okay
I’m not alright.
I’m trying to tell you, alright
I’m trying
Because I want to breath,
I want to be whole.
This glass star heart,
Its light is fading,
It still burns,
But it hurts, the tears hurt.
Even the silence,
That is here because I couldn’t catch up,
Because I couldn’t speak loud enough.
Its hard to explain,
Its hard to describe what I want,
What I need,
The kind of bonds I need.
But please don’t give up on me.
I’m trying, alright
What am I supposed to say?
What am I supposed to do?
With the way you look at me,
With the way I’m left behind,
Even by the people who surround me.
I know things change,
I see them change.
As I watched a sprout grow into a tree,
I watched as everyone around me grew.
Don’t tell me that’s it my fault,
Even if it is, I’m trying alright
Because I want to breath,
I want to be whole.
You can’t see it but I’m drowning,
I’m gasping for breath in the sea of my emotions.
The emotions that fill and flood my broken form,
This glass star heart,
Its light is fading,
It still burns,
But it hurts, the tears hurt.
My voice hurts from crying,
My chest hurts from screaming the words,
Even from the words that are stuck inside.
Its hard to explain,
Its hard to describe what I want,
What I need,
The kind of bonds I need,
I hopefully wish for.
But please don’t give up on me
Because I don’t want to give up on you
I want to believe that like our spirits,
Bonds can be indomitable
Please don’t give up on me
This broken glass star that is me
The light is still burning
Like my hope
Like my wish
So please don’t give up on me
Because what am I supposed to say;